Making New Friends After Relocation

Reviewed Nov 15, 2016

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Summary

  • Find out where to meet people who share something in common with you.
  • Consider each person you meet as a potential friend.
  • Let friendships develop over time.

Friends support, nurture, and affect our lives every day. Because relocating to a new area can disrupt your social niche in a community, shrink your support system, and weaken your self-esteem, it is vitally important to develop new relationships to replace those left behind.

Where to meet friends

Whether you move to a rural community, large city, or foreign country, recognize that each place has its own unique identity. You probably will feel lonely and out of place at first. You may interact with many people but feel no connection to them.

To develop friendships, first find out where to meet people who share something in common with you. Consider some of the following places:

  • Volunteer programs
  • Workplaces
  • Sporting events
  • Schools
  • Tours
  • Places of worship
  • Clubs
  • Craft and pet shows
  • Community theaters
  • Neighborhood events

From acquaintance to friend

The next step, strengthening a relationship, actually is a series of many, subtle steps. It may be helpful to remember a concept expressed by Aristotle, “Wishing to be friends is quick work, but friendship is slow-ripening fruit.” Unlike families in which births and marriages mark relationship beginnings, friendships develop over time with no clear-cut onset.

Consider each person you meet as a potential friend. Friendships almost always begin with superficial conversations like discussing the weather, children, pets, or sports. This light talk is a give-and-take process that eventually may include sharing deeper feelings.

The degree of trust shared with another person determines the type of friendship you have, such as casual, working, etc. Keep in mind that all levels of friendship are important and can begin at any place, any time. People you meet as new acquaintances, like co-workers during a coffee break, can become special friends after facing problems, overcoming struggles, or sharing successes together.

Tips for making friends

  • Be a friend; extend yourself.
  • Be yourself, but be tactful.
  • Do things that make you happy—research shows that happiness attracts people.
  • Hone conversation and listening skills.
  • Ask people about themselves rather than making “I” statements.
  • Maintain eye contact.
  • Overcome shyness, fear of rejection, or low self-esteem through counseling or personal-improvement workshops.
  • Improve social skills through role-playing.
  • Don’t wait for invitations; send your own.
  • Don’t force a relationship that isn’t meant to be.
  • Don’t expect close friends instantly.
  • Don’t gossip.
  • Don’t be judgmental.

Friends are everywhere. You may just not have met them yet.

By Joanna L. Parker, RN, Med
Source: Fresh-Cut Flowers for a Friend by Dianna Booher. Word Books, 1997; Just Friends: The Role of Friendship in Our Lives by Lillian B. Rubin. Harper & Row, 1985; Moving to a Small Town: A Guidebook for Moving From Urban to Rural America by Wanda Urbanska and Frank Levering. Simon & Schuster, 1996; Positive Moves by Carolyn Janik. Weidenfeld & Nicolson, 1988; The Friendship Book: The Art of Making and Keeping Friends by Rita Robinson. Newcastle, 1992; The Insiders’ Guide to Relocation by Beverly Roman. The Insiders’ Guide Inc., 1996.

Summary

  • Find out where to meet people who share something in common with you.
  • Consider each person you meet as a potential friend.
  • Let friendships develop over time.

Friends support, nurture, and affect our lives every day. Because relocating to a new area can disrupt your social niche in a community, shrink your support system, and weaken your self-esteem, it is vitally important to develop new relationships to replace those left behind.

Where to meet friends

Whether you move to a rural community, large city, or foreign country, recognize that each place has its own unique identity. You probably will feel lonely and out of place at first. You may interact with many people but feel no connection to them.

To develop friendships, first find out where to meet people who share something in common with you. Consider some of the following places:

  • Volunteer programs
  • Workplaces
  • Sporting events
  • Schools
  • Tours
  • Places of worship
  • Clubs
  • Craft and pet shows
  • Community theaters
  • Neighborhood events

From acquaintance to friend

The next step, strengthening a relationship, actually is a series of many, subtle steps. It may be helpful to remember a concept expressed by Aristotle, “Wishing to be friends is quick work, but friendship is slow-ripening fruit.” Unlike families in which births and marriages mark relationship beginnings, friendships develop over time with no clear-cut onset.

Consider each person you meet as a potential friend. Friendships almost always begin with superficial conversations like discussing the weather, children, pets, or sports. This light talk is a give-and-take process that eventually may include sharing deeper feelings.

The degree of trust shared with another person determines the type of friendship you have, such as casual, working, etc. Keep in mind that all levels of friendship are important and can begin at any place, any time. People you meet as new acquaintances, like co-workers during a coffee break, can become special friends after facing problems, overcoming struggles, or sharing successes together.

Tips for making friends

  • Be a friend; extend yourself.
  • Be yourself, but be tactful.
  • Do things that make you happy—research shows that happiness attracts people.
  • Hone conversation and listening skills.
  • Ask people about themselves rather than making “I” statements.
  • Maintain eye contact.
  • Overcome shyness, fear of rejection, or low self-esteem through counseling or personal-improvement workshops.
  • Improve social skills through role-playing.
  • Don’t wait for invitations; send your own.
  • Don’t force a relationship that isn’t meant to be.
  • Don’t expect close friends instantly.
  • Don’t gossip.
  • Don’t be judgmental.

Friends are everywhere. You may just not have met them yet.

By Joanna L. Parker, RN, Med
Source: Fresh-Cut Flowers for a Friend by Dianna Booher. Word Books, 1997; Just Friends: The Role of Friendship in Our Lives by Lillian B. Rubin. Harper & Row, 1985; Moving to a Small Town: A Guidebook for Moving From Urban to Rural America by Wanda Urbanska and Frank Levering. Simon & Schuster, 1996; Positive Moves by Carolyn Janik. Weidenfeld & Nicolson, 1988; The Friendship Book: The Art of Making and Keeping Friends by Rita Robinson. Newcastle, 1992; The Insiders’ Guide to Relocation by Beverly Roman. The Insiders’ Guide Inc., 1996.

Summary

  • Find out where to meet people who share something in common with you.
  • Consider each person you meet as a potential friend.
  • Let friendships develop over time.

Friends support, nurture, and affect our lives every day. Because relocating to a new area can disrupt your social niche in a community, shrink your support system, and weaken your self-esteem, it is vitally important to develop new relationships to replace those left behind.

Where to meet friends

Whether you move to a rural community, large city, or foreign country, recognize that each place has its own unique identity. You probably will feel lonely and out of place at first. You may interact with many people but feel no connection to them.

To develop friendships, first find out where to meet people who share something in common with you. Consider some of the following places:

  • Volunteer programs
  • Workplaces
  • Sporting events
  • Schools
  • Tours
  • Places of worship
  • Clubs
  • Craft and pet shows
  • Community theaters
  • Neighborhood events

From acquaintance to friend

The next step, strengthening a relationship, actually is a series of many, subtle steps. It may be helpful to remember a concept expressed by Aristotle, “Wishing to be friends is quick work, but friendship is slow-ripening fruit.” Unlike families in which births and marriages mark relationship beginnings, friendships develop over time with no clear-cut onset.

Consider each person you meet as a potential friend. Friendships almost always begin with superficial conversations like discussing the weather, children, pets, or sports. This light talk is a give-and-take process that eventually may include sharing deeper feelings.

The degree of trust shared with another person determines the type of friendship you have, such as casual, working, etc. Keep in mind that all levels of friendship are important and can begin at any place, any time. People you meet as new acquaintances, like co-workers during a coffee break, can become special friends after facing problems, overcoming struggles, or sharing successes together.

Tips for making friends

  • Be a friend; extend yourself.
  • Be yourself, but be tactful.
  • Do things that make you happy—research shows that happiness attracts people.
  • Hone conversation and listening skills.
  • Ask people about themselves rather than making “I” statements.
  • Maintain eye contact.
  • Overcome shyness, fear of rejection, or low self-esteem through counseling or personal-improvement workshops.
  • Improve social skills through role-playing.
  • Don’t wait for invitations; send your own.
  • Don’t force a relationship that isn’t meant to be.
  • Don’t expect close friends instantly.
  • Don’t gossip.
  • Don’t be judgmental.

Friends are everywhere. You may just not have met them yet.

By Joanna L. Parker, RN, Med
Source: Fresh-Cut Flowers for a Friend by Dianna Booher. Word Books, 1997; Just Friends: The Role of Friendship in Our Lives by Lillian B. Rubin. Harper & Row, 1985; Moving to a Small Town: A Guidebook for Moving From Urban to Rural America by Wanda Urbanska and Frank Levering. Simon & Schuster, 1996; Positive Moves by Carolyn Janik. Weidenfeld & Nicolson, 1988; The Friendship Book: The Art of Making and Keeping Friends by Rita Robinson. Newcastle, 1992; The Insiders’ Guide to Relocation by Beverly Roman. The Insiders’ Guide Inc., 1996.

The information provided on the Achieve Solutions site, including, but not limited to, articles, quizzes, and other general information, is for informational purposes only and should not be treated as medical, health care, psychiatric, psychological or behavioral health care advice. Nothing contained on the Achieve Solutions site is intended to be used for medical diagnosis or treatment or as a substitute for consultation with a qualified health care professional. Please direct questions regarding the operation of the Achieve Solutions site to Web Feedback. If you have concerns about your health, please contact your health care provider.  ©2017 Beacon Health Options, Inc.

 

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