Parenting a Teen With a Mental Health Issue or Substance Use Disorder

Reviewed Apr 15, 2021

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Summary

  • Parents can take steps to ensure their teen receives a proper evaluation, appropriate treatment, and available services.
  • Support groups and self-care can help parents become more effective at advocacy, coping, and problem-solving.

Staying positive can be hard if your teen has a mental health or substance use issue. You want to help. But deep down, you know that you can’t control the issue or the choices your child makes. You may find the mental health system to be confusing. This can make you feel helpless and without choices. And self-doubt and self-blame may make you doubt your skills as a parent.

Parenting a teen with a mental health or drug issue is a huge task. But the love you have for your child will give you the strength you need. Read on to learn steps you can take to help them and yourself.

Find a mental health provider

There are two things to keep in mind when looking for the right care for your teen. First, an assessment and recovery course should only come after a full evaluation. This can take many office visits. Second, whomever your child sees must welcome and respect your opinion and treat you as a partner in your child’s care.

If you are unhappy with the provider, or don't feel good about the assessment or care, get a second opinion. Ask your family doctor to suggest a mental health expert who works with teens and families.

Make sure care aligns with best practice

When a family is in crisis, parents are often willing to try anything. This is one more reason to find a skilled mental health worker, who is more likely to know best practices in helping teens. Keep in mind that some care that works for adults may not work or be best for teens. For example, group programs for drug problems, which are sometimes court-ordered, can undermine healing and even backfire by connecting teens with peers who glorify drugs and support use.

Reach out to parents who have walked in your shoes

Being a parent of a child with a mental health or drug issue can be isolating. Some people will feel for you, but that’s not the same as knowing what you are going through. Plus, the stigma and judgment of others can wear away your self-esteem.

This is why finding a support group is key. Parents who know what you are going through can give aid that is hard to find elsewhere. Support groups can also help you learn how to:

  • Cope with crisis and challenges
  • Learn the mental health system and get help
  • Advocate for your child
  • Take care of your family needs
  • Cope with stress

Al-Anon has groups for people who have family members with a drug issue.

The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) has groups for families of people living with mental illness. NAMI also has Family-to-Family, a free program taught by trained caregivers of people with mental illness. People who have taken this course say they feel more empowered, less anxious, and better able to solve issues that can come up when parenting a child with mental illness.

Learn how to advocate for your child

Find out what services are on hand, and what your child can get. Become allies with teachers, social workers, doctors, and others. Expect timely replies and be assertive if needed.

Take time to care for yourself

The wish to put your teen’s needs before your own may always be there. But you will be a better parent if you look after your own health and well-being. Take a few minutes each day to do something that you enjoy or helps you relax. Now and then, make time to be with people you love and care about.

If you find that too much worry or the burden is too much to bear, seek help. Talk therapy can help you to work through any pull on your marriage or family life. This strain can happen when so much energy is aimed at parenting one child.

By Christine Martin

Summary

  • Parents can take steps to ensure their teen receives a proper evaluation, appropriate treatment, and available services.
  • Support groups and self-care can help parents become more effective at advocacy, coping, and problem-solving.

Staying positive can be hard if your teen has a mental health or substance use issue. You want to help. But deep down, you know that you can’t control the issue or the choices your child makes. You may find the mental health system to be confusing. This can make you feel helpless and without choices. And self-doubt and self-blame may make you doubt your skills as a parent.

Parenting a teen with a mental health or drug issue is a huge task. But the love you have for your child will give you the strength you need. Read on to learn steps you can take to help them and yourself.

Find a mental health provider

There are two things to keep in mind when looking for the right care for your teen. First, an assessment and recovery course should only come after a full evaluation. This can take many office visits. Second, whomever your child sees must welcome and respect your opinion and treat you as a partner in your child’s care.

If you are unhappy with the provider, or don't feel good about the assessment or care, get a second opinion. Ask your family doctor to suggest a mental health expert who works with teens and families.

Make sure care aligns with best practice

When a family is in crisis, parents are often willing to try anything. This is one more reason to find a skilled mental health worker, who is more likely to know best practices in helping teens. Keep in mind that some care that works for adults may not work or be best for teens. For example, group programs for drug problems, which are sometimes court-ordered, can undermine healing and even backfire by connecting teens with peers who glorify drugs and support use.

Reach out to parents who have walked in your shoes

Being a parent of a child with a mental health or drug issue can be isolating. Some people will feel for you, but that’s not the same as knowing what you are going through. Plus, the stigma and judgment of others can wear away your self-esteem.

This is why finding a support group is key. Parents who know what you are going through can give aid that is hard to find elsewhere. Support groups can also help you learn how to:

  • Cope with crisis and challenges
  • Learn the mental health system and get help
  • Advocate for your child
  • Take care of your family needs
  • Cope with stress

Al-Anon has groups for people who have family members with a drug issue.

The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) has groups for families of people living with mental illness. NAMI also has Family-to-Family, a free program taught by trained caregivers of people with mental illness. People who have taken this course say they feel more empowered, less anxious, and better able to solve issues that can come up when parenting a child with mental illness.

Learn how to advocate for your child

Find out what services are on hand, and what your child can get. Become allies with teachers, social workers, doctors, and others. Expect timely replies and be assertive if needed.

Take time to care for yourself

The wish to put your teen’s needs before your own may always be there. But you will be a better parent if you look after your own health and well-being. Take a few minutes each day to do something that you enjoy or helps you relax. Now and then, make time to be with people you love and care about.

If you find that too much worry or the burden is too much to bear, seek help. Talk therapy can help you to work through any pull on your marriage or family life. This strain can happen when so much energy is aimed at parenting one child.

By Christine Martin

Summary

  • Parents can take steps to ensure their teen receives a proper evaluation, appropriate treatment, and available services.
  • Support groups and self-care can help parents become more effective at advocacy, coping, and problem-solving.

Staying positive can be hard if your teen has a mental health or substance use issue. You want to help. But deep down, you know that you can’t control the issue or the choices your child makes. You may find the mental health system to be confusing. This can make you feel helpless and without choices. And self-doubt and self-blame may make you doubt your skills as a parent.

Parenting a teen with a mental health or drug issue is a huge task. But the love you have for your child will give you the strength you need. Read on to learn steps you can take to help them and yourself.

Find a mental health provider

There are two things to keep in mind when looking for the right care for your teen. First, an assessment and recovery course should only come after a full evaluation. This can take many office visits. Second, whomever your child sees must welcome and respect your opinion and treat you as a partner in your child’s care.

If you are unhappy with the provider, or don't feel good about the assessment or care, get a second opinion. Ask your family doctor to suggest a mental health expert who works with teens and families.

Make sure care aligns with best practice

When a family is in crisis, parents are often willing to try anything. This is one more reason to find a skilled mental health worker, who is more likely to know best practices in helping teens. Keep in mind that some care that works for adults may not work or be best for teens. For example, group programs for drug problems, which are sometimes court-ordered, can undermine healing and even backfire by connecting teens with peers who glorify drugs and support use.

Reach out to parents who have walked in your shoes

Being a parent of a child with a mental health or drug issue can be isolating. Some people will feel for you, but that’s not the same as knowing what you are going through. Plus, the stigma and judgment of others can wear away your self-esteem.

This is why finding a support group is key. Parents who know what you are going through can give aid that is hard to find elsewhere. Support groups can also help you learn how to:

  • Cope with crisis and challenges
  • Learn the mental health system and get help
  • Advocate for your child
  • Take care of your family needs
  • Cope with stress

Al-Anon has groups for people who have family members with a drug issue.

The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) has groups for families of people living with mental illness. NAMI also has Family-to-Family, a free program taught by trained caregivers of people with mental illness. People who have taken this course say they feel more empowered, less anxious, and better able to solve issues that can come up when parenting a child with mental illness.

Learn how to advocate for your child

Find out what services are on hand, and what your child can get. Become allies with teachers, social workers, doctors, and others. Expect timely replies and be assertive if needed.

Take time to care for yourself

The wish to put your teen’s needs before your own may always be there. But you will be a better parent if you look after your own health and well-being. Take a few minutes each day to do something that you enjoy or helps you relax. Now and then, make time to be with people you love and care about.

If you find that too much worry or the burden is too much to bear, seek help. Talk therapy can help you to work through any pull on your marriage or family life. This strain can happen when so much energy is aimed at parenting one child.

By Christine Martin

The information provided on the Achieve Solutions site, including, but not limited to, articles, assessments, and other general information, is for informational purposes only and should not be treated as medical, health care, psychiatric, psychological, or behavioral health care advice. Nothing contained on the Achieve Solutions site is intended to be used for medical diagnosis or treatment or as a substitute for consultation with a qualified health care professional. Please direct questions regarding the operation of the Achieve Solutions site to Web Feedback. If you have concerns about your health, please contact your health care provider.  ©Carelon Behavioral Health

 

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