Summary
Offer emotional support to your unemployed spouse by listening to their concerns.
Has your companion lost their job? Has a gloomy feeling settled in—maybe causing both of you to feel very stressed, even hopeless?
You can play a major role in helping your mate to rebound. While finding a new job can be a long process, your attitude and clear-headed approach can help turn the crisis around.
Offer emotional support
Act and speak in hopeful ways. This will help your spouse to assume the same attitude. A hopeful atmosphere at home should help your mate feel more confident during job interviews.
Listen to your mate’s real concerns. If you voice too much optimism, you will only cause them to feel cut off and totally alone with the problems.
Remind them that temporary plans are powerful. For example, finding a temporary job, as quickly as possible, can be the bridge to get your family across troubled waters.
Encourage them to divide up time wisely. Looking for a new job will be stressful. Remind your mate that mixing too many tasks in a single day will cause confusion and more stress.
Point out that working in long stretches and focusing well works best. For example: Could your spouse research job opportunities Thursday through Saturday? Then, they could make calls, send emails and submit applications Monday through Wednesday.
Keeping your marriage intact
Since preserving your family is your foremost goal, don’t allow a job search to hurt your marriage. Do these things to take pressure off the relationship:
Spend time apart. Tension will escalate if you spend all of your free time with your mate while you’re under severe stress. Besides, spending time apart allows you both to see friends—who may offer job ideas, support and tips for networking.
Do some nice things for yourself. Sure, you may be the spouse who’s still employed, but doesn’t that simply add to your own pressures? Recognize that you need attention and stress-relief, too.
Keep your “honey do” list reasonable. An unemployed person is probably struggling with ego problems, not to mention anxiety and outright fear. So avoid the temptation to use them for too many chores or errands—just because they're not at work.
Incorporate recreation religiously. All work and no play can drive couples apart—even if there aren’t any employment problems going on. Now isn’t the time to stay overly serious 24 hours a day.
Dealing with the job search
As you try to relieve stress, keep in mind that acquiring a job is still your mate’s main goal. Encourage them to create a plan of action as soon as possible.
Remind your spouse to:
Visit job counselors and consultants. Even if you must pay an expert to offer advice on job hunting and career transitions, this can be money well spent.
Track the action plan in writing. One lost email address could cost your partner an interview. One failure to follow up on a phone call could cost them a job.
Since writing is an active endeavor—requiring thought and planning—this exercise will help your mate to feel more in control of the job search process. By tracking people to contact about jobs, dates for letters to go out, and times for interviews, your spouse can “strategize” the job search and follow up promptly on every contact.
Invent possible jobs from their host of skills. Help your spouse think up possible employment by listing their skills from baking to banking.
Put all odds in their favor. That is, submit plenty of resumes—at least 30 each week—and keep the phone calls and emails going. Nothing takes the place of dedicated calling, emailing and following up.
Summary
Offer emotional support to your unemployed spouse by listening to their concerns.
Has your companion lost their job? Has a gloomy feeling settled in—maybe causing both of you to feel very stressed, even hopeless?
You can play a major role in helping your mate to rebound. While finding a new job can be a long process, your attitude and clear-headed approach can help turn the crisis around.
Offer emotional support
Act and speak in hopeful ways. This will help your spouse to assume the same attitude. A hopeful atmosphere at home should help your mate feel more confident during job interviews.
Listen to your mate’s real concerns. If you voice too much optimism, you will only cause them to feel cut off and totally alone with the problems.
Remind them that temporary plans are powerful. For example, finding a temporary job, as quickly as possible, can be the bridge to get your family across troubled waters.
Encourage them to divide up time wisely. Looking for a new job will be stressful. Remind your mate that mixing too many tasks in a single day will cause confusion and more stress.
Point out that working in long stretches and focusing well works best. For example: Could your spouse research job opportunities Thursday through Saturday? Then, they could make calls, send emails and submit applications Monday through Wednesday.
Keeping your marriage intact
Since preserving your family is your foremost goal, don’t allow a job search to hurt your marriage. Do these things to take pressure off the relationship:
Spend time apart. Tension will escalate if you spend all of your free time with your mate while you’re under severe stress. Besides, spending time apart allows you both to see friends—who may offer job ideas, support and tips for networking.
Do some nice things for yourself. Sure, you may be the spouse who’s still employed, but doesn’t that simply add to your own pressures? Recognize that you need attention and stress-relief, too.
Keep your “honey do” list reasonable. An unemployed person is probably struggling with ego problems, not to mention anxiety and outright fear. So avoid the temptation to use them for too many chores or errands—just because they're not at work.
Incorporate recreation religiously. All work and no play can drive couples apart—even if there aren’t any employment problems going on. Now isn’t the time to stay overly serious 24 hours a day.
Dealing with the job search
As you try to relieve stress, keep in mind that acquiring a job is still your mate’s main goal. Encourage them to create a plan of action as soon as possible.
Remind your spouse to:
Visit job counselors and consultants. Even if you must pay an expert to offer advice on job hunting and career transitions, this can be money well spent.
Track the action plan in writing. One lost email address could cost your partner an interview. One failure to follow up on a phone call could cost them a job.
Since writing is an active endeavor—requiring thought and planning—this exercise will help your mate to feel more in control of the job search process. By tracking people to contact about jobs, dates for letters to go out, and times for interviews, your spouse can “strategize” the job search and follow up promptly on every contact.
Invent possible jobs from their host of skills. Help your spouse think up possible employment by listing their skills from baking to banking.
Put all odds in their favor. That is, submit plenty of resumes—at least 30 each week—and keep the phone calls and emails going. Nothing takes the place of dedicated calling, emailing and following up.
Summary
Offer emotional support to your unemployed spouse by listening to their concerns.
Has your companion lost their job? Has a gloomy feeling settled in—maybe causing both of you to feel very stressed, even hopeless?
You can play a major role in helping your mate to rebound. While finding a new job can be a long process, your attitude and clear-headed approach can help turn the crisis around.
Offer emotional support
Act and speak in hopeful ways. This will help your spouse to assume the same attitude. A hopeful atmosphere at home should help your mate feel more confident during job interviews.
Listen to your mate’s real concerns. If you voice too much optimism, you will only cause them to feel cut off and totally alone with the problems.
Remind them that temporary plans are powerful. For example, finding a temporary job, as quickly as possible, can be the bridge to get your family across troubled waters.
Encourage them to divide up time wisely. Looking for a new job will be stressful. Remind your mate that mixing too many tasks in a single day will cause confusion and more stress.
Point out that working in long stretches and focusing well works best. For example: Could your spouse research job opportunities Thursday through Saturday? Then, they could make calls, send emails and submit applications Monday through Wednesday.
Keeping your marriage intact
Since preserving your family is your foremost goal, don’t allow a job search to hurt your marriage. Do these things to take pressure off the relationship:
Spend time apart. Tension will escalate if you spend all of your free time with your mate while you’re under severe stress. Besides, spending time apart allows you both to see friends—who may offer job ideas, support and tips for networking.
Do some nice things for yourself. Sure, you may be the spouse who’s still employed, but doesn’t that simply add to your own pressures? Recognize that you need attention and stress-relief, too.
Keep your “honey do” list reasonable. An unemployed person is probably struggling with ego problems, not to mention anxiety and outright fear. So avoid the temptation to use them for too many chores or errands—just because they're not at work.
Incorporate recreation religiously. All work and no play can drive couples apart—even if there aren’t any employment problems going on. Now isn’t the time to stay overly serious 24 hours a day.
Dealing with the job search
As you try to relieve stress, keep in mind that acquiring a job is still your mate’s main goal. Encourage them to create a plan of action as soon as possible.
Remind your spouse to:
Visit job counselors and consultants. Even if you must pay an expert to offer advice on job hunting and career transitions, this can be money well spent.
Track the action plan in writing. One lost email address could cost your partner an interview. One failure to follow up on a phone call could cost them a job.
Since writing is an active endeavor—requiring thought and planning—this exercise will help your mate to feel more in control of the job search process. By tracking people to contact about jobs, dates for letters to go out, and times for interviews, your spouse can “strategize” the job search and follow up promptly on every contact.
Invent possible jobs from their host of skills. Help your spouse think up possible employment by listing their skills from baking to banking.
Put all odds in their favor. That is, submit plenty of resumes—at least 30 each week—and keep the phone calls and emails going. Nothing takes the place of dedicated calling, emailing and following up.