Don't Let Financial Worry Stress Your Marriage

Reviewed May 6, 2016

Close

E-mail Article

Complete form to e-mail article…

Required fields are denoted by an asterisk (*) adjacent to the label.

Separate multiple recipients with a comma

Close

Sign-Up For Newsletters

Complete this form to sign-up for newsletters…

Required fields are denoted by an asterisk (*) adjacent to the label.

 

Summary

  • Talk about it and acknowledge “we” have a problem.
  • Assess your situation and needs.
  • Decide what you want to accomplish—together.

Economic stress is tough on marriage. But with a little effort, collaboration and discipline you can attain financial peace.

Here are some practical tips.

Talk about it

If your savings account, cash flow or retirement has been hurt by a rough economy, or if you are drowning in debt, talk about it. Healthy marriage is rooted in love and trust so be open about finances and how you feel about your financial situation. Denial will only delay getting into the solution. You and your spouse may have been taught very different things about money from your parents.

The issue isn't just about money, but about trust and respecting each other. Being able to encourage each other when painful financial realities come crashing down is essential to your marriage.

“We” have a problem

In tough economic times your income may decrease, your debt may rise or your retirement investment may take a major hit. These realities can cause fear and tension in your marriage. Stop and say “we have a problem.” This will allow you to get on the same side and attack the issue together. Casting stones at your spouse does nothing to eliminate financial stress—it only builds resentment and takes the focus from solving the problem at hand.

Honestly assess your situation and needs

Money is complicated. Unless you have a degree in accounting or financial management you may need advice and strategies for managing your money.

Some people are so intimidated by financial matters that they withdraw from addressing them, mostly because they feel inadequate. For example, balancing a checkbook is easy when you have plenty of money; it’s tough when money is scarce.

On the other hand, some people overestimate their financial acumen and make risky decisions. Again, when money is plentiful bad decisions usually aren’t as devastating. When money is short, a bad decision can cause real damage.

Decide what you want to accomplish—together

In order to succeed financially as a team, you must have unity. You may not agree about everything, but find areas where you do agree and aim toward those goals. Start small. For example, you can agree to have $1,000 in an emergency cash account. Or agree to cut up a high-interest credit card and pay it off in 6 months, or only to eat out once per week.

These small successes will energize you to work harder and support each other. You can ease the burden if you both focus energy toward a tangible goal rather than casting blame or arguing about who is right or wrong.

Ditch your debt

Don't let your debt run your life. During tough financial times “cash only” is usually the best policy. Agree to work together on a basic budget and track your spending to see where the money is going. It is important to know how much you are putting on a credit or debit card each month, and how much you spend on entertainment and eating out.

Allot some fun money

In tough times it is important to set aside money to spend on things that you enjoy. Know that you cannot be the money police for your spouse. This will only make things worse.

Each person needs a small sum of cash that he can spend however he chooses. Agree up front how much that will be. You can make adjustments at the end of a month but only if you both agree. For example, most couples find that 90 percent to 95 percent of their income goes to pay bills, pay debt, meet savings targets, etc. The remaining 5 percent to 10 percent can be divided between you to spend as you please.

Save anyway

Even in tough times you should maintain or open a savings account—but one that is not easy to access. Why? Because convenience increases the temptation to draw out funds impulsively. The best strategy is to start saving a small sum at first, then increase the amount periodically as you can.

Unexpected bills and emergencies are unavoidable. It's good to be financially prepared for them by keeping some money aside. This will give you peace of mind.

Don’t panic—start planning together

Sit down together, take a deep breath, grab a notepad and start talking and writing. If you need help, call a financially savvy friend or family member. You can also call the toll-free number on this site for more information.

By Drew Edwards, MS, EdD

Summary

  • Talk about it and acknowledge “we” have a problem.
  • Assess your situation and needs.
  • Decide what you want to accomplish—together.

Economic stress is tough on marriage. But with a little effort, collaboration and discipline you can attain financial peace.

Here are some practical tips.

Talk about it

If your savings account, cash flow or retirement has been hurt by a rough economy, or if you are drowning in debt, talk about it. Healthy marriage is rooted in love and trust so be open about finances and how you feel about your financial situation. Denial will only delay getting into the solution. You and your spouse may have been taught very different things about money from your parents.

The issue isn't just about money, but about trust and respecting each other. Being able to encourage each other when painful financial realities come crashing down is essential to your marriage.

“We” have a problem

In tough economic times your income may decrease, your debt may rise or your retirement investment may take a major hit. These realities can cause fear and tension in your marriage. Stop and say “we have a problem.” This will allow you to get on the same side and attack the issue together. Casting stones at your spouse does nothing to eliminate financial stress—it only builds resentment and takes the focus from solving the problem at hand.

Honestly assess your situation and needs

Money is complicated. Unless you have a degree in accounting or financial management you may need advice and strategies for managing your money.

Some people are so intimidated by financial matters that they withdraw from addressing them, mostly because they feel inadequate. For example, balancing a checkbook is easy when you have plenty of money; it’s tough when money is scarce.

On the other hand, some people overestimate their financial acumen and make risky decisions. Again, when money is plentiful bad decisions usually aren’t as devastating. When money is short, a bad decision can cause real damage.

Decide what you want to accomplish—together

In order to succeed financially as a team, you must have unity. You may not agree about everything, but find areas where you do agree and aim toward those goals. Start small. For example, you can agree to have $1,000 in an emergency cash account. Or agree to cut up a high-interest credit card and pay it off in 6 months, or only to eat out once per week.

These small successes will energize you to work harder and support each other. You can ease the burden if you both focus energy toward a tangible goal rather than casting blame or arguing about who is right or wrong.

Ditch your debt

Don't let your debt run your life. During tough financial times “cash only” is usually the best policy. Agree to work together on a basic budget and track your spending to see where the money is going. It is important to know how much you are putting on a credit or debit card each month, and how much you spend on entertainment and eating out.

Allot some fun money

In tough times it is important to set aside money to spend on things that you enjoy. Know that you cannot be the money police for your spouse. This will only make things worse.

Each person needs a small sum of cash that he can spend however he chooses. Agree up front how much that will be. You can make adjustments at the end of a month but only if you both agree. For example, most couples find that 90 percent to 95 percent of their income goes to pay bills, pay debt, meet savings targets, etc. The remaining 5 percent to 10 percent can be divided between you to spend as you please.

Save anyway

Even in tough times you should maintain or open a savings account—but one that is not easy to access. Why? Because convenience increases the temptation to draw out funds impulsively. The best strategy is to start saving a small sum at first, then increase the amount periodically as you can.

Unexpected bills and emergencies are unavoidable. It's good to be financially prepared for them by keeping some money aside. This will give you peace of mind.

Don’t panic—start planning together

Sit down together, take a deep breath, grab a notepad and start talking and writing. If you need help, call a financially savvy friend or family member. You can also call the toll-free number on this site for more information.

By Drew Edwards, MS, EdD

Summary

  • Talk about it and acknowledge “we” have a problem.
  • Assess your situation and needs.
  • Decide what you want to accomplish—together.

Economic stress is tough on marriage. But with a little effort, collaboration and discipline you can attain financial peace.

Here are some practical tips.

Talk about it

If your savings account, cash flow or retirement has been hurt by a rough economy, or if you are drowning in debt, talk about it. Healthy marriage is rooted in love and trust so be open about finances and how you feel about your financial situation. Denial will only delay getting into the solution. You and your spouse may have been taught very different things about money from your parents.

The issue isn't just about money, but about trust and respecting each other. Being able to encourage each other when painful financial realities come crashing down is essential to your marriage.

“We” have a problem

In tough economic times your income may decrease, your debt may rise or your retirement investment may take a major hit. These realities can cause fear and tension in your marriage. Stop and say “we have a problem.” This will allow you to get on the same side and attack the issue together. Casting stones at your spouse does nothing to eliminate financial stress—it only builds resentment and takes the focus from solving the problem at hand.

Honestly assess your situation and needs

Money is complicated. Unless you have a degree in accounting or financial management you may need advice and strategies for managing your money.

Some people are so intimidated by financial matters that they withdraw from addressing them, mostly because they feel inadequate. For example, balancing a checkbook is easy when you have plenty of money; it’s tough when money is scarce.

On the other hand, some people overestimate their financial acumen and make risky decisions. Again, when money is plentiful bad decisions usually aren’t as devastating. When money is short, a bad decision can cause real damage.

Decide what you want to accomplish—together

In order to succeed financially as a team, you must have unity. You may not agree about everything, but find areas where you do agree and aim toward those goals. Start small. For example, you can agree to have $1,000 in an emergency cash account. Or agree to cut up a high-interest credit card and pay it off in 6 months, or only to eat out once per week.

These small successes will energize you to work harder and support each other. You can ease the burden if you both focus energy toward a tangible goal rather than casting blame or arguing about who is right or wrong.

Ditch your debt

Don't let your debt run your life. During tough financial times “cash only” is usually the best policy. Agree to work together on a basic budget and track your spending to see where the money is going. It is important to know how much you are putting on a credit or debit card each month, and how much you spend on entertainment and eating out.

Allot some fun money

In tough times it is important to set aside money to spend on things that you enjoy. Know that you cannot be the money police for your spouse. This will only make things worse.

Each person needs a small sum of cash that he can spend however he chooses. Agree up front how much that will be. You can make adjustments at the end of a month but only if you both agree. For example, most couples find that 90 percent to 95 percent of their income goes to pay bills, pay debt, meet savings targets, etc. The remaining 5 percent to 10 percent can be divided between you to spend as you please.

Save anyway

Even in tough times you should maintain or open a savings account—but one that is not easy to access. Why? Because convenience increases the temptation to draw out funds impulsively. The best strategy is to start saving a small sum at first, then increase the amount periodically as you can.

Unexpected bills and emergencies are unavoidable. It's good to be financially prepared for them by keeping some money aside. This will give you peace of mind.

Don’t panic—start planning together

Sit down together, take a deep breath, grab a notepad and start talking and writing. If you need help, call a financially savvy friend or family member. You can also call the toll-free number on this site for more information.

By Drew Edwards, MS, EdD

The information provided on the Achieve Solutions site, including, but not limited to, articles, quizzes, and other general information, is for informational purposes only and should not be treated as medical, health care, psychiatric, psychological or behavioral health care advice. Nothing contained on the Achieve Solutions site is intended to be used for medical diagnosis or treatment or as a substitute for consultation with a qualified health care professional. Please direct questions regarding the operation of the Achieve Solutions site to Web Feedback. If you have concerns about your health, please contact your health care provider.  ©2017 Beacon Health Options, Inc.

 

Close

  • Useful Tools

    Select a tool below

© 2017 Beacon Health Options, Inc.